One Month Comparison!

One Month Post Op.
(February 2013

November 2012

One Month Post Op.
(February, 2013)

November 2012

Week Four: February 6th -12th, 2013

This was a better week.  I am eating almost normally now.  Ate in my first restaurant since the surgery - had the yummiest soup in the whole city... Roasted Mushroom Soup from Milestone's Restaurant.  MMMMMM!

Had my first follow up appointment at the orthodontist which went quite well! I've had some pretty major concerns because my bite is still not correct, but I keep forgetting that I have another 6-12 months of braces left and both my surgeon & my orthodontist insist that my bite will be corrected within the year.  YAY! I am right back to work now, and am back singing, but still find my speech is affected a bit.  During the ortho appointment, the configuration of my elastics was altered - not too hard to manage, and now I am finally using those creepy Frankenstein screws I previously put in a picture of.  *lol*  So they aren't just for show!

In case you'd forgotten... (new elastics not pictured... *ha*)

Went to the mountains and had a lovely time at the dog park with my puppy.  Pre-surgery routine is slowly coming back again.  I am back to work again at the theatre, singing again, eating many things I like - and only two more weeks until I can ACTUALLY chew again - going to the theatre, working at the barn - can't ride my horse for a couple months though - dog walking for my clients again... Will be starting burlesque/dance lessons in a couple weeks... Taking a playwright's boot camp with one of my favorite playwrights (THE Sharon Pollock, author of Blood Relations, among many others).  Yeah.  Life is building back up.  It's funny; despite the fact that I work in theatre, I've been actually going to more performances since the surgery than before! AND.. I am going on a mini holiday the first weekend in March to see one of my favorite actors perform in a play about a subject that has become very close to my heart... Residential schools.  I am very excited.  Not to mention, I get to party (meaning pizza, movies and a sleepover - party animals, we are... *lol*) with an old friend, who's giving me a place to stay, while I'm there!

It's been good!

Here are some pictures from Week 4! There aren't many again! *haha*

Still quite puffy... Makes a lop-sided smile..
(24 days post op!)

I'm like a cone head with that swollen jaw..
(24 days post op!)

Wow! My neutral face STILL looks mean!
(24 days post op!)

Profile!!
(24 days post op!)

Just for fun, my fur-baby in the mountains!

Can you see that joyful smile from where you are???

All made up, on my way to a friend's concert... PS - That's a tree behind my head - not antlers.. Just for the record!
(26 days post op)

Week Three: Jan. 30th - Feb. 5th, 2013

This week's secret word? DEPRESSION!!!!

I know it may seem ridiculous.  I mean, after all - I lived through the surgery, which is fantastic.  I am making great strides in recovery - huge relief... But something just kept pulling at me during week three.  Like I was being dragged into the mud.  I thought about things that could be in the future.  Positive things, things I love to do.  People I want to see.  But it all just seemed so far away.  It's almost as though the tape player in my head was stuck on the negative side and all I could see was the negative side.  I don't recall every crying so much in my life as I did that week.  Very unsettling.  I was quite concerned about how dark things were becoming, so I did what I always do when I am having a terrified hypochondriac moment - I turned to the internet! I researched a little and found that post-op depression is an extremely common symptom of anesthesia. In a way this was a relief, but also frightening when I read of a 21-year old boy who committed suicide 3 weeks post surgery after never suffering from depression before.  YIKES! So with a history of mental health behind me, I immediately booked an appointment with my awesome counselor and did A LOT of sleeping.  I feared I would never come back out of it, but then something happened...
This is a bit of a delicate matter and did not directly affect me necessarily, however it certainly provided a gigantic boot in the ass for yours truly which sent my depression packing!!!
A dear friend lost her house in a fire which also claimed the life of her mother & her two dogs.  This friend is also battling cancer.  Needless to say, I was rocked... I sent her some words of love & support, but it never really feels enough! All I can do is send my love... I cannot bring back all she has lost.  It made me realize... Live, love & laugh as often as you can.  Take NOTHING for granted.  I lived through this surgery! I have my mom, dad, Remington, friends... Family... And I LOVE THEM ALL! And am learning to love myself too.  And to pursue the life I want now, while I can.

As for my recovery... Things are going well at the close of week three... Going to more shows, seeing more and more people outside my immediate family.  Eating more & more complex things. Somehow I only managed one picture from week three...! *lol*  ENJOY IT!!!! ^_^

I LOVE how unpuffy I look here! I think it's cause I was lying flat on the bed...

Week Two: Jan. 22nd - 29th, 2013

Really noticing the numbness this week.  The first week was such a blur of sleeping, syringing, panic & pouting that I didn't really notice much else.  But this week, it drove me crazy!! The constant tickling sensation that is not quite a real feeling... The crazy itches that I can't scratch because I CAN'T FEEL MY FLESH!!!! Yeah... But that aside, I made some great strides as the week progressed...

• Was able to get my mouth open enough to start brushing, which felt absolutely incredible! 
• Managed to choke down an ENTIRE frappuccino.  Although it took me about 5 hours, a tiny spoon and a whole lot of napkins.  
• Was at long, long last able to breathe through my nose.  
• Got the go ahead to drive myself around again.  
• Went and got my hair done - fell asleep in the chair, but still... 
• Went to a reading of my play (5th draft), although I was ready to collapse by the end.
• Made my first few treks to the dog park with my pup.  He was ecstatic!
• The drooling has stopped!!! Hooray!!!!!!
• The nose bleeds have stopped. Woo hoo!
• I still crave proper food - but as the week went on I managed more and more variety in the diet and was able to retire my syringe.  Go mashed potatoes, refried beans and soup!
• I moved back into my bedroom upstairs - SO good to sleep in my bed instead of on the couch
• Attended some theatre and actual saw some people aside from family.  Still feel like a bit of a freak in public, but hey...
• On the 29th (one day AFTER my play reading, of course) I got my splint removed! That was a major happy dance inducer.  Although, once it was off, I realized that my bite is still WAY off on the sides, but the doctor assures me that this will be fixed within the year.  Whew!

Have some photos! Fun!

Choking down that Frappuccino (Jan. 22nd)

Damn! Parrot lips, or what?! (Jan. 24th)

New hair do, with some purple...
(Jan. 25th)

On the way to the reading of my play.  First time with make-up post surgery.. Also, my two week anniversary!!!
(Jan. 28th)

Week One: Jan. 17th - Jan. 21st, 2013

 Thoughts from this week...

• Thank GOODNESS I can be here with my parents!
• I miss proper FOOD!!!
• I am so sick of drooling! Yuck!
• I look like a cross between a sumo wrestler, a parrot & a drowning victim!
• Is that MY face???
• Where are my bruises??
• Oh, there they are...
• Boost is delicious!
• I am SO SICK OF BOOOOST!
• I love you, Boost, I didn't mean what I said...
• Where's the ice-pack?
• Where's the humidifier?
• Where's the pizza? Oh, wait... 
• I am thrilled I lived through it... But bring on the food!
• Where's the dry towel? 
• Thanks for that mom.. And that, and that... And that too... 
• I just want to brush my teeth!
• This is never getting better is it...
• It IS going to get better, right?
• Did someone just poke me or is that the codeine again?
• I'm glad I got new pain meds... No more nightmares or phantom head patters.
• So THAT'S what happens if you don't take your antibiotics properly... (see pictures & explanation below!)

This was a hard week... Things were kind of OK until I woke up on the 18th or 19th with my left eye swollen shut.  Like shut... As in I had to pry it open.  Scared shitless, my mom & I drove frantically to the surgeon's office where they hooked me up to (yet another) an IV and pumped me full of antibiotics and special fluids... I dozed and cried for a few hours while stuff dripped into my veins, got a well deserved lecture (they were really very sweet - BIG, HUGE thank you to one nurse in particular at the office) on taking my antibiotics on time and actually consuming a sufficient amount of fluids.

Had a couple of post-op visits with the doctor which were very comforting.  Also, had a friend over a couple times which was a help.  I'm afraid I wasn't quite friendly with her as I normally would be, but she is that incredible type of person who is there for me even when I am a stroppy cow!

Struggling a lot with lack of appetite and just plain exhaustion - sleeping on the couch is hard.  Not sleeping through the night by any stretch.  Had crazy nightmares induced by my painkillers, as well as mild hallucinations - mom caught me swatting at people who weren't there - I could've sworn they were poking me and stroking my hair.  SO glad my lovely surgeon switched my painkillers!!

Here are some pictures!! Including the worst of the sumo days - ie: Swollen eye day!

Going home - nose still bleeding.. (Jan. 17th)

Could I look more like a whale? (Jan. 17th)

Discharge papers!! Made it home! (Jan. 17th)

OK - time to settle it for sleep. (Jan. 17th)

Jan. 18th - My inner SUMO emerges..

This is how I woke up one Jan. 18th... And yes, it burned too... 

Yep - this is what eating looked like in that first week.  Syringe ahoy..! (Jan. 19th)

My hot & sexy neck bruises (Jan. 20th)

Trying to stay serene - swelling going down a bit (Jan. 20th)

Just so glad I can open both eyes again! (Jan. 20th)

One week milestone! (Jan. 21st)

One week milestone - Profile! (Jan. 21st)

Just had to post this - I found it a week after surgery... Finally figured out what those bumps on the inside of my lower jaw are - yep... These are Frankenstein style screws drilled into my lower jaw! GAK! One on each side...

Oh, Those Hospital Days...

Ok, so being in the hospital SUCKED!

The nurses were incredible and kind.  They took great care of me and were gentle, and patient.  But I'm not going to lie - It's a different world there.  Dignity is something you have to let go of.

So here we go...

Before the surgery, mom took a few last photos for before and after... Here they are:

From the front

Earrings taped in case of cautery

Did I always look so demonesque?

After the actual surgery on January 14th, I stayed in hospital until the morning of the 17th.

Thoughts and memorable things about the hospital...

• Never feeling physically comfortable, mainly because I was not allowed to lie flat, and the hospital bed, though very high-tech was SO uncomfortable.
• Falling asleep holding my phone I was so exhausted - so much for checking Facebook and keeping up with emails
• Startling awake in the night when the staff would do checks and take vitals
• How amazing, courteous, kind, gentle & patient the staff were!
• Having to cart the IV around with me everywhere was completely mental! I was SO afraid I would yank it out by mistake - and it was in such a weird place... In the middle of my inner forearm... Yikes!
• Walking around in the halls at the urging of the nurses and seeing so many different people - wondering; what is their story?
• Getting scolded for not eating enough... ME!!!
• Learning to eat, drink and rinse my mouth using a syringe... :-s
• Experiencing the WORST pain I can ever remember (aside from tearing my ACL) in the form of nose plugs being removed (Gramma, that one's for you!) -> Seriously, these are evil things that start out being the size of coffee stirrers and are used to soak up blood in the nasal cavities... Once placed, they swell like those tiny blow-up sponge toys you get at birthday parties and then... when the time is right? They YANK THEM! And Great BALLS of Bloody FIRE! I'm talking agony! I thought they'd dragged the back of my skull out my nose.  I thought I was going to vomit from the pain! This also began the nose bleed that didn't end for 8 days *lol*
• The complete euphoria I felt whenever I saw my parents come around the curtain each time they would visit.
• How teary I'd get over the kindness of the staff and small kindnesses of my parents.

Enjoy some hospital pictures from immediately after surgery.

Am I sexy yet? 

A whole new profile

A hot mess!

Well, at least the tape is off my face...

And some additional photos from the remainder of my hospital stay... Days one & two post-op (Jan. 15th & 16th)

Right - I drool now.  Great!

The whole kit & caboodle! Ice pack, oxygen tent, mustache dressing (real name!) and nose packs (covered!)

SO glad to be alive to see the sunlight!!

This picture makes my nose hurt!

Note to self: NEVER break your nose!!

Trying to stay zen...

Who, When, What, Why & How...

WHO:
Me, Emily.  Theatre Artist, animal lover, dog owner, writer, daughter... Food LOVER! *Danger bells*
Current Age: 26
Age at beginning of all this.....: 22

WHEN:
Surgery Date: Monday, January 14th, 2013

WHAT:
Lefort I Surgery (A horizontal fracture of the upper jaw, above the teeth and below the nose - a grisly business) following 4 years of braces.

WHY:
Because I WANNA BE PRETTY!!! No seriously, the procedure will correct TMJ and help to prevent degenerative jaw disease including arthritis and an incorrect bite.

HOW: 
Oh, I don't know.  I'm just going to have some drugs and let them work.  I looked up the procedure online, but I kind of blocked it out.  All I know is they break my upper jaw, move it forward, hold it with permanent (titanium) plates and screws and afterwards I won't be able to eat solid food for at least six weeks! Ack!

So, those basics covered, let's move into the visual aids...

Some Before Photos...

Taken at age 19

Taken at age 21, about a year before braces...

Taken at age 24 - September 2010

October & November 2012 - JUST before the 1st attempt at surgery.... Age 25/26

And thus, we begin...

Wish me good luck!

-Em-

xx